Boring is probably the worst insult you can get. I think most people would rather be mean or rude than boring. Boring means nobody cares to think of you because there's not much to think.

So why do so many businesses settle for being boring? 

Here are three common things businesses do that make them boring and bland, and what to do instead if you want to titillate your audience


1. Use superlatives

Unless a reputable source said it’s so (and you can cite them), saying you are The Best at anything is pretty lame. How do we know you’re the best-- because you said so? Of course you’re going to say that, you’ve got a pretty obvious agenda.

Give some specifics. Whether it’s Geiko saying they will save you 10% or more on car insurance (instead of saying they are “the cheapest”), or Dominos saying they will deliver your pizza in 30 minutes or less or it’s free (instead of saying they have fast delivery), Specifics are more believable and will go much farther than some generic claim with nothing to back it up or compare it to.

You can also say something entirely different and badass- but that’s a different article.


2. Write too many words

Unless we are sitting down to read a book we actually want to read, we don’t want to read. So if you can’t sum up your point in a few sentences or less, don’t bother writing it.

And break up your points with paragraphs.

And use headlines.

Because they are easier to read, and lots of words are boring.


3. Talk about yourself

It’s hard not to talk about ourselves, after all we are the inspiration and the reason for our business' existence. Maybe compare it to being ones child, an extension of ourselves. We are the center of our own universes, and it’s a habit that’s hard to shake.

So it’s no wonder that everyone has their bio, their story, and their history all over their website. It’s the story we know, and it feels important.

But you know what is interesting and important to me, the customer? What you’re going to do for me. How looking at your website, or learning about your company, is going to benefit me.

Us customers are not just self-centered a-holes, and it's not as cold and sad as it sounds. It’s actually quite wonderful! It’s the reason businesses exist: to create and give value to others. It’s a noble cause that comes with a perk of being able to support yourself monetarily.

So do us a solid and talk more about the value you created for us, and how it’s going to help us, and stop telling us about your hobbies and pets and how long you’ve been in business (I don’t want the oldest company, I want the most effective company for solving my problem.)

Your customers, and your bank account, will thank you handsomely.